Spilled Out From Nowhere...but His Faithfulness

I can’t explain how thankful I am and how amazed I am at how God works. I love Him. It’s like He’s constantly telling me, “Lauren, I’m not going to fit in your box”. Just when we think we’ve figured Him out, become comfortable with our idea of His character, He does something that drastically reveals the never-endingness of who He is. It’s times like that where He draws us into the wilderness, which for a while seems to consist of nothing but confusion and contradiction. The wilderness- the place of uncomfortableness, the place where He strips us, strips our box to its very foundation, shakes everything that can be shaken. But there, in that place of broken humility and tender aching of the soul, He speaks comfort. It is there, if we’re willing to remain, to endure the heat, the burn from the scorching Son, that He will begin to give us the water of His word. To refresh our souls from the drought that was needed to break through our pride and answer the cry for a desperate passion. It is there, in the place we least expected, that He brings joy unspeakable and full of glory. The wilderness- a beautiful picture of the grace and love of the ultimate lover. It is there where, like the most phenomenal gardener, He grafts us deeper into the Vine- opening up the promised vineyards of our inheritance through our adoption. Our very life source becomes a part of who we are. In that wilderness He places valleys, the last thing we would want to go through, as doors of hope- to open our eyes to the things unseen, to increase our faith while we have nothing of ourselves to hold on to, nothing of our logic to distort the reality of Him. The gentlest Guardian, He protects us from ourselves. It is there, in the place of what should be considered mourning, that He orchestrates the most amazing song of praise in our Spirit…the master musician. Like a skillful historian He reminds us of our days of utter despair and desolation- proving to us His faithfulness with the most irrefutable case any lawyer could ever imagine. 

Pouring in and pouring out. His heart echoes within the chambers of our souls, rhythmically synchronizing each and every movement to fit His perfectly. Breathe in. Breathe out. This is Life. Simultaneously, better yet singularly. Him. Betrothed, in righteousness. One, in faithfulness. It is here we know and are known with an intimacy like no other. It is here where the two become one- something much deeper than one flesh. The two become ONE. One Spirit. Him. For is this not the whole point of life? Is this not life itself? To be ONE with Him for the glory of Him. 

This is the beauty of the wilderness- ironically considering how much we try to avoid it. Maybe it’s because we can’t see what’s happening while we’re there- Oh, but the refreshing that comes by enduring- this is what trust is. Staying when you don’t even know where you are. Waiting when there seems to be nothing to wait for. Moving forward when it seems like you have no direction. Listening when all that you hear is silence. Crying out even when you get not one response. Trust is endurance- it’s the manifestation of not only our belief but our love for Him. Because of that may we, like Paul said, “hold fast to the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.” So be it. 

I’m not sure where all that came from- somewhere inside me that’s been hidden for a while. I’ve been praying, not knowing what to pray for. Listening, by hearing (for the most part) silence. I’ve been walking all the while feeling like I’m in place. “What has He been doing in me? Has He been doing anything? What are You trying to reveal to me? Teach me Father.” These have been my questions. But as I can see, He is. He is faithful. This post is more for me than it is for you. We have an amazingly breathtaking God- do you realize that? There really is no one like Him. I’m reminded of that song:

 He gives beauty for ashes,

Strength for fear,

Gladness for mourning,

Peace for despair

 And of course Shane & Shane with:

I'm so satisfied
At the thought of You
Growing up in me
Covering everything
My happiness is found in less
Of me and more of You

And this all happens in the wilderness. And so, may our joy be made full. In Him. Only Him.