This semester has been, so far...overwhelming (in every sense of the word). But let it be known that our amazing, unfailing, forever faithful Father is working in me. As Treva put it a couple weeks ago, He's bringing me to the end of my rope, where I have to give up all self-security and self-reliance and let go completely. I've been remembering why I'm here, what it's for, WHO I'm for, and let me say- it IS worth it. Every aspect of it.
The other day I was trying to finish up my dreaded Chemistry homework assignment and was looking for some more notebook paper in my book sac. In the middle of all those blank pieces of paper I saw two pages with my handwriting on them. I looked at the date in the top right corner, February 4, 2010. I don't remember writing it but it was exactly what I needed to read at that moment. It's one of those -let me just get it out on paper- moments I have at times. I love when things like that happen! So let me share it with you:
And what is it that I live by? What is it that I live for? Is it the selfish motives of my humanity? or the sacrificed life I live for Him? Am I held captive by my mind, intellect, personal understanding, emotions, desires? Or do I walk in the freedom that is fully mine through Christ? For it was and is for freedom that Christ set me free. To live anything else is sell the victory of the Cross short. The moment I put myself, my way, my thoughts, my ideas and my interpretation above Him- I lose myself, simply because I lose the communion and fellowship with Him. Abiding in Him should be the focus. For if we are not in Him we can bear nothing of value. He is the source of life- the beginning, the end, THE life. If we separate ourselves from the very life source we shrivel up and die like mere weeds dries up by the scorching Son. Without His life we have no light. For in Him is life and the life is the light of men (John 1:4). Why? Why for one moment would we want to separate ourselves from the life of Christ, the fullness of the Godhead- the fullness of our Father and His righteousness. It has been given to us so that we may become the very righteousness of God through and because of Christ and His blood. How could we not want that sweet fellowship with Him? So many times people sum up Christ-life to fellowship with other believers but, if there is not true fellowship with the heart of the Father- there can be no true fellowship with the saints. And without this checks and balances we can't call ourselves sanctified.And that last part, that has been my prayer. That my heart, mind and spirit would be conformed even more to His. He has given us everything that pertains to both life and godliness, so why not walk in it? With everything going on lately, becoming overwhelmed has been the easiest thing to do. However, there is one thing that never ceases to speak more to my heart than any amount of words- the sky. Every time I look up and see those stars He speaks. "You see Lauren, the stars are held up by my hand, I've got you." His love is more than I can comprehend at this moment. His patience is so sweet. His faithfulness is constant, and His mercy...yes His mercy, is new every morning :) He is so good~
- We overcome be the blood of the Lamb, the word of our testimony, loving not our lives even unto death.
I must come to say that the remedy to all issues in life lies in the changing, transforming power of life in Christ Jesus. Our prayer should be: Refine, change, alter my character, fit it into Your likeness. One heart, one mind, one spirit with The heart, The mind and The Spirit.
- Walk in the light as He is in the light and have fellowship with one another so that the blood of Jesus will cleanse you from all sin.
2 comments:
I love it.
I love you!
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